Let's be honest. Michelle Bachmann is wildly unqualified for any kind of public office. But more importantly, the vast amount of entertainment available to us is pretty awesome. And you know what makes good entertainment? Besides dick jokes? Good actors. I specify actors because print media is dead. Having the right actors makes or breaks a series. Of course, this means good actors are in high demand, resulting in the most talented actors being recycled. Which is where things get a little incestuous. Yes, right now the actor on screen may be playing a struggling suburban father. But just last week he was a Thai hooker. It gets confusing. That's why I endorse wholly embracing this phenomenon. Here are my suggestions:
1. Jesse L. Martin and Jerry Orbach, most known as the best young black guy/old white guy cop team ever to star on Law and Order, were also big musical buffs. Martin orginated the role of the gay anarchist professor with AIDS in the musical RENT, while Orbach was one of the most celebrated Lumieres in Beauty and the Beast. Why not combine their musical ability with the show that made them household names? I for one, would love to see a lavish duet performed by a candelabra and a bohemian about gunpowder residue found near the victim's apartment.
2. Tobey McGuire is arguably best known for his role as Spiderman in both movies. It's a shame they never made a third. But he also one critical acclaim for his role as a jockey (heh heh) in Seabiscut. Frankly, the movie would have been a lot more exciting if Spiderman just beat up a bunch of dwarfs on horseback instead of whatever inspiring bullshit they actually filmed.
3. Seth Rogen should replace every character he's played in a movie with his character from the cult classic TV show Freaks and Geeks. It'd be amazing to see him portray a loveable bumbling stoner in a project produced by Judd Apatow.
4. Christian Bale and Hugh Jackman played dueling magicians in The Prestige. Why not dueling magicians who happen to be superheros? Magic Batman vs. Magic Wolverine. The movie doesn't even have to be good, as comic books fans have repeatedly demonstrated their tolerance for abuse at the hands of film studios.
5. Lea Michelle, star of Glee got her break on Broadway staring in the world's most depressing musical: Spring Awakening. I for one, would enjoy Glee more if the main character was a pregnant 14 year old girl from late 19th Germany. She could still sing Journey though.
