GET A PRINT COPY: Distribution Spots
Straight Conversion Therapy
A scenario: you’re sitting around the crumbling, flaming hole acting as the fire pit in the co-op that you’ve spent your entire life in....
Requiem for a Particular Night
A poem by Christopher Hanlon A girl named Sarah Who could not have been finer Came to eat with me At a 1950s themed diner I wanted to...
A Trip with Rudy Giuliani
By Nicholas Dibagia Parody: https://www.erowid.org/experiences/exp.php?ID=55565 Dose: A handful, Oral, LSD Blotter; 1 bowl for recovery,...
The Buck Stops Here
By Nicholas Dibagia We’ve all heard the saying: “The buck stops here.” Maybe it was in that picture taken by a potato during Eisenhower’s...
Our Rankings Of The Best Cardinal Directions
By Brendan Dewley 4. South South should clearly be marked as the worst cardinal direction. South means down, and down is bad. 3. North...
Yeehaw! This Western Town Decided To Create A Modern Caste System
By Brendan Dewley Yeehaw! You got that right, partner! This southern town boilin’ in the swelterin’ heat of the New Mexico desert just up...
Schlissel Says Relax
By Nicholas Dibagia “What the fuck is going on?” “Who’s in quarantine now?” “Covid causes your sexual orifices to shrivel up?” These are...
They Met God
By Madylin Eberstein Skkt skkt. A pair of dusty cowboy boots thudded onto the saloon’s sand-sprinkled porch. The sun-bleached planks had...
Modern White Democrat Porn
Oval Office, The White House June 14, 2015 The year was 2015, and President Obama’s second term was coming to its fateful close against a...
Merely the Mons
By Sarah Aftab To Rajiv, I am sorry I quasi Jeffrey Toobin-ed you :(( Please read this apology to the tune of Monster Mash: I was just on...
Ross Ascending
A message from Stephen M. Ross: Dear Students and Staff of the Ross School of Business, THE TIME HAS COME FOR US TO CLAIM OUR DESTINY! As...









